Because I Said So: 33 Mothers Write About Children, Sex, Men, Aging, Faith, Race, and Themselves

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Ayelet Waldman, 'Bad Mother' - Los Angeles Times

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Flowers everywhere, cafes, dogs, bookstores. Waldman and Chabon and their four children, Sophie 14 , Zeke 12 , Rosie 8 and Abraham 6 , live in a gorgeous Craftsman house. Waldman rushes in from belly dancing class, offers the homemade cornmeal cranberry muffins that her children refuse to eat and some chocolate-covered sunflower seeds that go down surprisingly well.

How does social work think about gender?

After a week at home, she began to lose her mind. In the essay, Waldman admitted that she could survive the loss of a child but not the loss of her husband; that, yes, she loved her husband more than her children. UrbanBaby and other sites hung her out to dry.

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So very, very sorry. I am a bad mother. She has written about her suspicion that Zeke may be gay not exactly an issue in Berkeley.

But perhaps the most affecting chapter in the book is about the baby, nicknamed Rocketship, whom the couple aborted after amniocentesis revealed genetic abnormalities. And I killed him.


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Anything less feels to me to be hypocritical, a selfish abnegation of reality and responsibility. What would she do if Sophie became pregnant? In our lifetime, she says, the pressure to work ridiculous hours has increased. Women have to sacrifice ambition to have children.

Chapter 12. Gender, Sex, and Sexuality

Waldman feels extremely lucky that she and Chabon agree on so much about parenting and that they are able to share the work. Waldman has written in this book and elsewhere that she and her husband are one of the few married couples she knows who still have a sex life, a good sex life. While we are talking, Chabon comes in with Sophie, Zeke and Abe.

They have been shopping for vintage clothing on Telegraph Avenue and are eager to show us their haul, including a dress that fits Rosie perfectly. We leave the bustling kitchen to talk in the studio out back.

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